Relax.
It's easy to say that because my little one is sitting across the room as I write this. The papers are signed and everything is as it should be. But seriously, sit back and take everything as it comes. If you get high strung about the whole overwhelming process you are costing yourself extra stress. I'll admit this was hard for me to do, but it is truly necessary to place the process in God's hands and trust that everything will work out in His time.
Be Organized.
This was an easy one for me. (most of the time!) Keep every scrap of paper, card, and phone number handed to you. You never know when you'll need it. Whenever someone tells you that you need a document, mail it to them the next day. If they tell you to make an appointment, take the next available one. Move fast when the ball is in your court, because when it's not it may take awhile to get it back.
Be Yourself.
Through out this process your whole life will be on display for everyone to see. At least, that's what it felt like when the worker sat down and asked me "What's the worst thing that has ever happened to you". I wept as I told her about my mom being sick for so long. I was open and honest about my own childhood struggles. It's okay to show workers your humanity and vulnerabilities. They want to know that children are being placed in a good home, not a perfect home.
Wait.
It's true, the waiting is the hardest part. There were times when I thought I might go crazy from the waiting. (I think I did once.) I could fill this step with all sorts of cliches, but I care more about you than that. Here's the deal. if you focus on the waiting it will kill you. Focus instead on the here and now of it. If this is your first child spend time together as a couple. Take joy in the moments of everyday life and rest easy in the fact that one day your child will be in your arms.
Pray.
It goes without saying that this is an important step. But I wanted to add this word of encouragement: never get tired of praying for the process. When it comes to adoption, this is my calling. Everyone prays broad prayers about the adoption and child, and that's great. But, I pray for the specifics. I intercede for the workers, the judge, the file clerks, and the everything in between. Since our experience, I see the need to pray for the tiny details of the process.
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| Philip Joseph Russell Day, June 30, 2010 |
I hope this post has encouraged you! I would love to pray for your adoption, so please feel free to message me with any request!
